While looking at the patterns of my lays, I noticed something crucial to game. This also explains why there are many of you that are actually attractive men, but your lay rates suck and aren’t what they should be. Many of you already know what cold approaching is, so keeping with the terminology and not needing to confuse, do any of you know what a warm approach and a hot approach is? My guess? You have no clue. Why not? These don’t exist in the PUA dictionary. I think I may have heard warm approach a time or two, but not by the same definition. Back to what I was saying, when I was getting laid every weekend, I realize that I had a ton of hot approaches. And a big part of my success now, is that I operate in mostly warm approach territory. Most of you operate solely in cold approach territory, hence why the number of your successes aren’t that great. So what are the true definitions of a cold, warm, and hot approach? I’ve compiled these myself and here they are:

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An approach that takes place in any area where a woman has many excuses and opportunities to leave your presence while gaming, and anywhere you have a lot of male competition and distractions. Such places include huge nightclub complexes such as downtown or arena/warehouse districts, day game places where she can easily go about her business and leave you, or continue doing what she was doing and easily tune you out (reading a book, listening to her ipod). You may also include huge house parties where there is a lot of male competition. Also any approach where there are no indicators of interest.

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An approach that takes place in any area where a woman has some excuses and opportunities to leave the area, but is unlikely to do so if you approach her and seem like an OK guy. Such places include small bars, bars with slow business, smoking areas of bars where a woman is likely to make frequent stops and spend a considerable amount of time, or day game places where she is likely (but doesn’t have to) to spend a considerable amount of time, such as the grocery store, library, etc. In general, there isn’t a lot of male competition or distractions. Also any approach where there are already indicators of interest such as eye contact.

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An approach that takes place in any area where a woman is forced to notice you, and there are little to no excuses to leave the area. This includes SMALL house parties or social gatherings where she’s likely to be for a considerable amount of time. During the day, such places include intramurals, small classes in school, work, or any other small closed social event. Again, not a lot of male competition and distractions. Also any approach where the woman approaches you.

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The key to my success in the past, is that I spent about half of my time with warm approaches by going to bars on dead nights during the week, and I spent the other half hosting, or going to small social gatherings and small house parties where women were more receptive to me. I also didn’t spend time where there was a lot of male competition, usually less than 20 guys total. Notice that I didn’t include social circle game as a warm or hot approach. Why not? Social circles can still be a cold approach. Huge house parties? Although it is social circle game, there are a lot of distractions, and a lot of male competition. I would seldom pull at huge house parties, even the ones I hosted. I almost always pulled at the small ones or when I had a small group of people over. The classroom? Again, I never pulled in those huge auditorium classrooms, but I almost always pulled in the small classes with less than 25 students. In fact those women would approach and constantly flirt with me. You know bartenders and promoters? Any women you meet through them is still a cold approach. She isn’t familiar with you, and although you know each other, she is still likely to succumb to the same distractions and male competition as if you were just a random guy. In short, social circle doesn’t matter until you are a part of the smaller social events where women are forced to recognize you and won’t easily blow you off, never to see you again for the entire night.

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When I looked at a drop in my lay rate, it was because I wasn’t placing myself into warm and hot approach situations. In essence, I was spending too much time with cold approaches. And now I’m seeing my rates shoot back up again. Why? Because I spend almost all of my time in smoking areas of bars, and I go to the smaller bars in the suburbs or isolated parts of town. In these situations, if you’re an attractive guy, women are much more forgiving of your mistakes and flaws. This phenomenon really hit me when I looked at myself and how I treated hot women. If I was in a place such as a strip club on a slow night, I’d get barraged with hot women and was very quick to dismiss them. However, if I was in a slow bar, I’d be more forgiving. And if there were very few other hot women, or if I was in a situation where I had to see her on a periodic basis, I almost always locked in on her. The above explains why on certain nights, I’d get hit on frequently by women, and on another, it seemed like I would be busting my ass in order to get a solid pull. It’s not necessarily supply & demand, and although S&D; is a factor, the environment plays a crucial role as well. So if you’re having difficulty wit lay consistency, take a look at your field reports, and see if you’re spending most of your time doing an approach where the odds are against you.

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